When I Snapped—and What I Learned

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” — Viktor E. Frankl

How many of us have reacted in the heat of the moment—only to regret it later?
We feel emotions like anger, disappointment, or frustration rise up… and then we just snap. It feels like something takes over, and before we know it, we’ve said or done something that doesn’t sit right with us later.

Something like that happened to me recently. It wasn’t dramatic, but it stayed with me—because it reminded me of a lesson I needed to learn again.

The Incident at Disneyland

A while back, I was in Disneyland with my family. We had gotten separated before the evening fireworks. If you’ve ever been near the castle during that time, you know it gets really crowded. I was trying to make my way through the people to get back to them when I came near a group of three women.

Suddenly, they started yelling at me.
"We’ve been waiting here! How dare you try to cross the line!"
They weren’t just loud—they got verbally abusive. I was shocked, confused, and hurt. And, I snapped.

I got defensive and spoke back in anger. I don’t remember everything I said, but I know it wasn’t kind. After a few tense moments, I realized there was no point arguing and walked away. I spotted my family nearby, but I couldn’t bring myself to go to them. 

I was too upset. 

So I stood alone, crying, unable to control what I was feeling.

Sitting With the Why

Later that night, I kept going back to that moment.
Why did this happen? Why did it affect me so much?

The truth? I felt hurt. 

My ego got bruised.

I couldn’t handle being yelled at by strangers, especially when I felt I hadn’t done anything wrong. Their words touched something sensitive in me—and I reacted from that wounded place.

Because of that reaction, I missed out. 

I didn’t get to watch the fireworks with my loved ones. 

They missed sharing that joy with me too. 

All because I allowed my emotions to take control.

The Power of the Pause

Later, when things calmed down, I remembered something I knew in theory but often forgotten in the moment: 

Pause. Breathe. Respond—don’t react.

It’s completely okay to feel angry or sad. 

We don’t control what emotions rise up.
But we do have a choice in how we respond.

Looking back, I realized what those women said wasn’t about me at all. They didn’t know me. Their reaction came from whatever they were carrying inside. I just happened to be on the receiving end of it.

If I had paused, taken a breath, and simply walked away, I would have protected my peace. I would have saved myself from the stress, the tears, and the guilt that followed.

From Reaction to Reflection

That guilt—yes, it showed up too. I felt bad for yelling. Disappointed that I didn’t live up to the person I am trying to be. I thought “I know better… Why couldn’t I act better?”

But that’s where compassion comes in.
No, I didn’t fail some test from the universe. I was human. 

The real test wasn’t about being perfect—it was about learning and reflecting. And I did.

Before I began healing and therapy, I would’ve stayed upset for days. I would have blamed those women, replayed the moment again and again, feeling wronged. But this time, it only took a few hours. I sat with my emotions, reflected, and slowly let it go.

I even found some empathy for them. 

I truly believe no one wants to be mean. 

Maybe they were going through something themselves. 

Maybe I was just a target in that moment. 

And maybe that’s okay too.

I didn’t ace the test, but I’d say I got a solid B+.
I’m proud that I came to this realization on my own. 

This is what self-healing looks like. 

You don’t need someone to tell you what went wrong. You begin to see it yourself. 

That’s the power of inner work: it brings your own wisdom to the surface.

What I’ve learned

• Feel your feelings. They are real and valid.

• But don’t let them take control of you.

• Pause. Breathe. Respond. That one moment of awareness can change everything.

• And always reflect. That’s how we grow.

Final Thoughts: Progress, not Perfection

Healing isn’t about having it all figured out or getting it right every time.

It’s about getting to know yourself better, being kind to yourself when things feel messy, and learning as you go.

It’s about making more mindful choices over time—progress, not perfection—and trusting that every step, even the hard ones, is part of how you grow.

Your Turn

Have you ever had a moment like this? I’d love to hear how you navigated it and what you learned along the way. Leave a comment or reach out so that we can all learn and grow together.